All the galaxies belong to Russia

Let's get right to it:

Moscow today set out plans to conquer and colonise space, including a permanent manned moon base.

Deputy premier Dmitry Rogozin said: 'We are coming to the moon forever.'

I feel it's necessary to point out that these quotes are not from The Onion.  This comes from dailymail.co.uk.  I linked to it so you can see for yourself.

Putin, an insane person, has unlimited power in an equally insane country.  If you thought that was a recipe for attempted global domination, you're wrong.  That's why Putin is Putin and you're reading this blog.  What we have the makings for is much larger. 

Because this is Russia, they're not just settling for the moon.  Oh no.  Mars is next.  They've literally called dibs, so don't go getting any big ideas about colonizing your own planet. 

But don't fret just yet.  There's still a few things they need to do to pull of this plan:

'All we need is to learn how to combine idealism and pragmatism and how to properly organise our business.'

Things that Russia has yet to conquer in hundreds of years.  So I doubt they'll be able to get a grasp on that by 2040, the year they plan to officially open the doors on their moon version of Jurassic Park.

I'll admit, it's not all jokes.  Anytime Putin starts talking about colonizing something, it's a tad scary.

That said, there is a silver lining in all of this:

Putin wrestling bears in space? Not an impossibility!